I’m giving myself the shits!

I was at the gym this morning doing an interval session on the treadmill and was reflecting on my training/lifestyle performance over the past few weeks.  In a word.  Shit.

I’ve been making bad choices on top of bad choices.  Want a for instance?

Ok.  You asked for it.  Trained hard on Monday morning but we (Kirt and I) both felt that the session showed up our decadent weekend.  We got through it but didn’t smash out the session.  We didn’t dominate.  You know, when you can take it all and keep going?  So, feeling bad that day (not focusing on the fact that I actually DID a workout) we got lazy and decided to have Vietnamese for dinner.  Nothing wrong with that, we were going to have a nice Beef and Noodle Soup.  A tasty broth that’s got veges etc in it and is probably pretty healthy meal choice.  The curry puff entree wouldn’t have helped though.   The mistake.  We arrived hungry.  I’d hardly eaten all day except for lunch (again not following the plan).  Hungry people make bad food choices I’ve found.

Tuesday.  Had a full day of FinalCutPro training.  A video editing software package, all of which is very, very alien to me.  It was a long day with a guy in my house all day who I was paying by the hour to be there.  Needless to say, a day fuelled on coffee is not a nutritious day.  I did have lunch but again, that was about it.  Come dinner time and I’m mentally flogged and frustrated because I don’t think much of the training actually stuck and the whole process somewhat daunts me (perhaps that’s why I’ve not learnt anything new in ages…).  Dinner.  I suggested Breakfast Creek for a steak – a fallback for Kirt and I.  Kirt suggested we cook our own steak meal and ran to the shops to get a rack of Rib-on-the-bone.  Yummo!  Cooked on the Webber it took about 90 mins.  Better accompany that with a bourbon and coke.  Or two.  No.  Yesterday was not my ‘cheat’ day.  It was just a normal Tuesday.

Oh and guess what?  I’ve got my measure tomorrow.  I think I knew I’d stuffed up over Christmas and completely dropped the ball.  Oh well.  The truth will surface tomorrow and at least I’ll know the damage.

When I was running today I was thinking to myself “what is it that will shift this commitment/focus issue for me?”  “Why can’t I simply stick to the plan?  I love the process, I love the benefits.  Why is it so hard????”  Faaarrkk!

In Tony’s latest newsletter he talks about your reasons for achieving your goal as the legs holding up a table.  In his metaphor, the more legs the better.  The more stable and supportive your table is.  Might look a little odd, but I don’t think that’s the point he’s making.  He wants a stable, strong table.  Not necessarily a pretty one.  It got me to thinking.  What are the reasons for my goal/s.  If the goal is to look and feel great at 40 why do I want that?  40’s got nothing to do with it.  I’ve been working towards looking and feeling great for years now.  Albeit in a 2 steps forward, 1 step backwards kinda fashion.

So here are some of the reasons.

Health.  Self explanatory
Functional – so I can do the things I like to do and avoid injury.
Stand out from the crowd – I don’t want to be ordinary.  I don’t think any of us do.  Extraordinary might be a stretch goal but I’d like to stand out.  To be noticed.  To have people think “Gee, he looks fit/good/strong…”  or “I’d like to look or be like that”.  I’ve always sought to inspire or help people.  Just look at the work I do.  I’d like to do that through my own health and fitness too.

Then it got me wondering.  Are my reasons sufficient motivation.  Perhaps the strongest one is vanity (I want to look/be good so people are impressed) and I’m not sure that’s a motivation that stems from a good place?  The Health.  Well, as you can tell from most of the populations’ behaviour, that’s so far down the track that there’s always another day.   Functional?  To do what?  I like to ski but I think I need to ski more to be truly focused on being functional there.  I like to lounge around a pool or the beach.  Hmm.  Maybe I need something to train for.  Triathlons were good for that.  It gave your training a focus and a purpose that was quite short term.  Some periods I was racing every month.  The big races  were only about 3 months apart.  No where to hide then.

So.  Suggestions please.  What could/should I be training for?  Photos.  Competition.  Adventure?  Any suggestions gratefully accepted.

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